Life Inside the Box

It was a beautiful Monday morning as I walked into the office towards my cubicle, and, once again, I began thinking, “there has got to be more than this”. I’m sure many of you are familiar with this same, or similar, thought as you walk into your own office or cubicle. It usually starts off small, with a pang here and there, causing you to slowly begin loathing your “box”. Then your boss (or yourself, if you own your own business) is standing over your shoulder, demanding impossible deadlines, and the stress starts to take over. You feel anxious, frantic, worried… the list goes on. I get it. I’ve been in your shoes. I have wanted out of what I perceived to be my cage. To be released into my own world – full of all the things I love to do. Things like reading, spending time with my family, having girls night (without being completely exhausted), and… well, you get the picture. I simply wanted to live my own life, not dictated by anyone or anything.

About a year ago, I decided I was tired of spending 40+ hours slaving away in my cubicle: scattered with paperwork and endless to-do lists. So, my husband and I began our own company, in an attempt to free me (and eventually him) from our 8-5 grind – A.K.A. working for “the man”. Fast forward 10 months later. Although things didn’t go exactly as I had planned them to, I am currently job-free. Friend, I cannot stress to you how serious I am when I say things didn’t go as planned.

At the end of October, I was laid off from my long-term position as an Office Manager for a small family owned business. It was unexpected. It was hard. It was… AMAZING. As I drove back home, a 45 minute to an hour commute, I was overwhelmed with joy. I was crying, but not tears of fear or sadness. These were tears of pure bliss. Until that very moment, I had no idea just how badly I needed out of that painful place I called my box.

Once I got home, the fear set in. What were we going to do? What about the bills? How would we be able to make it through the holidays? I immediately got on my laptop and began cancelling, or pausing, auto-drafts. In the moment, the very first auto-draft I paused was my tithes to the church. That makes sense because I would not have an income coming in, right? Well, it depends on how you look at it. In the following blog posts, I will tell you how I overcame my lack of faith in the unexpected.